So I made it to my aunt’s house.
An 8 hour car ride by myself. It’s the first time I’ve driven that long on my own. I was kind of freaking out until I passed the Mall of Georgia. That’s the furthest north I’ve been on my own before. After that, the panic settled into excitement.
It was something I had to do for myself though. I’ve never been on my own, traveling, for longer than it takes to be on a plane. I plan on moving to California in the fall and I’d never been alone like that before. I’m in my early 20s and I felt it was a necessity before I move completely away from home.
It was nice. I got to be alone in a different way. There was no chance of my mom coming home at the end of the day or showing up in the car. It was just me and the road. I proved to myself that I can do things like this for myself. I can function fully on my own.
So. I’m not so anxious about moving out on my own. I can do this.
I had a dream that a bunch of my friends got make overs and then three of them started doing a mini concert in the store. First they were singing Jesus music then they started singing Christina Milian’s Dip It Low. So weird. Glad I woke up from that awkward.
My nephew pointed to one of the guys in the Hatfields & McCoys commercial and said, “JESUS!”
Screw portion sizes.
I want to eat until I’m full dag nabit. So full I’m on the verge of passing out with the itus.
But sweet mother, I’m trying to be healthy. I’m actually paying attention to portion sizes and trying to stick to them. I don’t think my body knows what to do. For the first time in years, it’s not trying to digest a herd of elephants after every meal. Just the one capybara. (Weird analogies since I’m a vegetarian, but eh.)
There’s still room in my stomach. But I don’t need to fil it.
I don’t.
I want to, but I don’t need to.
Does anyone else find the term “night owl” redundant?
My body wants things it doesn’t need. Like oatmeal creme pies and jelly beans.
Why am I even awake right now.
I’m realizing how little effort I put in to things.
If I can’t get something right within the first 5 or so times I attempt it, I usually give it up as a lost cause.
I don’t keep going until I succeed. Because I usually get angry with myself and deem myself a failure (which usually includes tears).
Perfectionism, kids. Don’t get trapped by it.
